A lot of Good byes

Wow. I just realized that I've already lived 21 years of my life and it all happened so fast and yet it feels like my life is just starting. I've been for the last years of my life a Christian, a transformed individual who used to say a lot of cursed words and has a wide-range vocabulary specially when it comes to insulting, making fun and just teasing innocent by-standers. I am also quite knowledgeable in understanding green jokes or double-meaning jokes. I am an expert in forcing people to do work and to pass the blame to anyone around or just simply vent my anger out on them. I guess for the last 18-19 years of my life I've been pretty much a self-centered idiot who only cared what concerns me and the only times I've tried to care about others is when it also concerns me and then I became a Christian and everything changed.

Becoming a Christian changed my whole heart, mind and soul. Even my passion! I used to addicted to anime, criminal books and even to those kind of materials that will make others puke at the very thought of it, I've tried those things and I didn't even flinch at the very sight of it. I've been involved in crazy things that made me realize is enough to get me a one-day pass to stay in the prison which I am thankful that never happened.

Well now, people would probably think I'm boring since I'm a straight-laced (haha) person and who will do everything for the LORD. Yes and No. Yes I will do everything for God but I'm not pretty sure if I'm as good as they assume me to be. I do know the number of foolishness I've done and God knows how bad I can be and how I have daily tantrums and complaints to Him which has now spared billions out there who would've been a victim of my tyrannical wrath.

Being a Christian is a crazy life. I'm serving the LORD by leading others to Him but more than that, I'm also praying for the grace to uphold the values that Jesus taught me. So why is this post about goodbye? Well... when I started my walk as a full-pledged and crazily-in-love with Jesus life, I've been warned, pre-warned and still warned that life wouldn't be as easy.

John 15:18 (NIV)

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first..."

The world hates Jesus. I know a lot of people are very open about their hate for Jesus and I don't care honestly, why? It's their life not mine. I'm not bothering them unless they bother me but more than that, Jesus will fight for Himself. He is GOD.

Emphasis here, so life isn't as easy as before! If I had a choice, I would've chosen an easy job which requires me to just go to the office, sleep then back home. I wouldn't have to go out of my comfort zone just to reach out people I don't know and introduce who Christ is to them... so life isn't easy and funny enough, one of the hardest part of my Christian life is the pruning.

John 15:1-2 (NIV) “I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2 He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes[a] so that it will be even more fruitful..."

Pruning according to wikipedia is "entails targeted removal of diseased, damaged, dead, non-productive, structurally unsound, or otherwise unwanted tissue from crop and landscape plants." So generally, it's to remove anything unwanted or anything that hinders the plant from being more productive. The reason I'm sharing this is because I feel like I'm in a pruning season right now.

I feel so TIRED and yet I still put my hope unto the LORD. I find perfect peace in Him alone. :)

credits to pengyangel2008